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RTD Original Stupidest Products (or ideas) Ever Weddings

Terribly Trashy Tuxes

It’s not only brides that choose bad outfits on their wedding days. Jerry Seinfeld once pointed out that all men look the same in tuxedos –these men certainly break that rule in the worst possible way.

I can’t see you, you’re in camouflage:
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Look, we get it, you’re either into hunting or you’re in the military or you’re in a crazy militia. Whatever the reason you thought it was a good idea to go “commando” for your wedding, you were wrong. Camouflage and weddings just don’t mix. For more terribly wonderful camo wedding images, check out this post from Tacky Weddings.

Someone wants to be Willy Wonka of the wedding world:

NOZZE DI CLEMENTE RUSSO E LAURA MADDALONI

Is that Prince beside you in the first pic? I know he can get away with wearing crap like that and acting straight, but you can’t. Bad call dude. We know you’re a tool, you really don’t need to try this hard to prove it.

Ohh the colors!! Ohh the stripes!!! Ohhh the humanity:
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Yeah, I love stripes and colors…but not diagonal stripped blue weirdness. Seriously guy, points for originality and all, but this is just ugly. And really, what’s up with your shoes? At this point, you should have just gone for the blue suede.

I’m afraid of clowns:
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Or at least, I’m afraid of clown weddings. Balloon animals and hats are fun and all, but it’s never a good thing when your tux can be popped at any given moment.

Some things are best left in the past:
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This twenties tuxedo is a perfect example. I know vintage clothes are awesome, but don’t let an item’s oldness blind you from its ugliness. A general rule is orange and brown stripes never look good.

Ironic, huh?
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I know, you’re trying to be such a cool hipster by wearing an ugly seventies tuxedo. Won’t everyone think you’re so funny for being ironic? Isn’t it so funny? The answer to both questions is no. You just look stupid and the mustache isn’t adding to the hipster factor, it just makes you look like even more of a tool. Your Flickr set only furthers this theory.

So there you have it. Bridezillas are not the only tasteless ones in weddings. Gentlemen can be just as stupid and tacky. Remember guys, it’s hard to go wrong in black and white.

Categories
RTD Original Stupidest Products (or ideas) Ever Weddings

The 10 Trashiest Wedding Dresses

Your wedding day is supposed to be a sweet and special day that you will remember for the rest of your life. Unfortunately, people with no class rarely gain any just because they’re tying the knot. Here’s 10 reasons you need to teach your kids about the sanctity of marriage -particularly the wedding gown.

10 ) The Detroit Special


Ordinarily I find the term ghetto to be a little offensive, but in this case, is there really a better term?

9  ) (Not) The Dream Team

Nothing says "I'll never be more than a two-bit trophy wife, nor will I ever move out of my crummy city" than a dress sporting your favorite sports team.
Nothing says “I’ll never be more than a two-bit trophy wife, nor will I ever move out of my crummy city” than a dress sporting your favorite sports team.

8 ) The “Wait, You Wanted It To Look Like That?”

While I love how many brides have been turning away from white, there's a point where you say "Do I want to look like I skinned a flamingo?" The answer should always be "no."
While I love how many brides have been turning away from white, there’s a point where you say “Do I want to look like I skinned a flamingo?” The answer should always be “no.”

7 ) The “Camel Toe & Side Boob Together At Last”

First off, shorts and camel toe are never a good look for your wedding. Second, when the top looks like suspenders carefully hovering over your nipples, I pray you’re marrying someone as tasteless as yourself -say Michael Jackson?

6 ) The “Is That A Doily You’re Wearing?”

Can you say say slizz-ut? It looks like someone hit her with a net gun and she just decided to work it as a gown.

5 ) The Private Dancer

Thank you to Shessoghetto.wordpress.com for the highlights on the viewer's faces. Seriously, the expressions at this show girl's wedding are great.
Thank you to Shessoghetto.wordpress.com for the highlights on the viewer’s faces. Seriously, the expressions at this showgirl’s wedding are great.

4 ) The “Make Papa Hefner Proud”

Tit's McGee is known for her class and elegance. Seriously, this dress looks like a champagne glass trying to serve as the Hoover dam.
Anyone knick named Tit’s McGee is not known for her class and elegance. Seriously, this dress looks like a champagne glass trying to serve as the Hoover dam.

3 ) The “When I grow up, I wanna be Chelsea Charms.”

I’d love to see her get in a fight with Tits McGee over who looks beter with their obscenely non-existent tops laid out.

2 ) The “Mommy Taught Me Right”

Tacky crystals and a huge train don’t trick anyone into thinking your dress is less trampy.

If you’re wondering what her mother would say, check out this respectful and demure mother of the bride dress. Yes, it does run in the family.

1 ) The “How Much Did Your Wife Cost?”

Russian brides rarely come this easy. Is she going to a wedding or to an auction block?

At least there’s a back to the dress…kind of.

If you enjoyed this post, be sure to check out its sister post, Terribly Trashy Tuxes.